Monday, October 30, 2006

Observations

From time to time I hope to post observations of the people around me. I see this as a sort of exercise in character building and... of course... observation. Within the next few weeks I hope to start a series of recolections about the people I worked with at camp but for now I'll leave you with this "exercise" from lunch today.

Often as I sit in the cafe at my school I listen in on the conversation going on around me. Many times this is not difficult to do because the people talk loud enough to be heard across the room. The conversation I heard today certainly falls into that category.

A group of three girls, most likely freshmen or sophomores or perhaps high schoolers (a large group has descended upon the school for the week) sat at the table diagonally in front of me. The girl farthest from me talked the loudest so many of her comments I heard even while I worked intently on the Spanish in front of me.

The thing that got me the most was the almost mindless repetitions (though varied each time) of criticisms they spewed. They often commented about a girls looks such as "I don't know why she gets up so early to do her make-up. Whenever she comes back she doesn't look any different." That statement is mild in comparison to the other things they said.

At one point the loudest of the trio called some other girl (obviously not present) a crass word for prostitute (wh---). Not only is that blatantly against school rules but also it is obviously not edifying or the least bit Christlike. At another point the girls started discussing an inordinate amount of hair on a girl's body in a place other than her head. I did not catch the place nor would I have wanted to. Their comments (in my mind at least) culminated with one of the girls comparing another absent acquantaince to "Shamu". I couldn't sit there any longer. (I also had something else pressing to do but that was comparitively on the back burner).

These girls displayed such arrogance in their own looks, in their own personality, in... I can't quite think of the word for it. Every time I heard yet another comment I would look up at them, simply astounded that they felt perfectly justified in hypocritically judging a person behind their back. My looks of disgust did not go unnoticed. The loudest girl had the audacity to raise her vocie further to say "Some people need to learn not to stare. That's so rude."

I almost laughed in disbelief and thought about confronting them. For anyone who knows me you can reasonably assume that I stayed in my seat and never said a word to them.

An hour or so later, after my class, when I stood in my house I conjured up everthing I would have said to that loudest girl and what her response would have been. I often wonder about things such as that... what would have happened had I done what I thought I should.

I wonder too what these girls lives are going to turn out to be. What is going to happen when their looks fade? What would happen if their thyroids gave out and they gained weight they simply could not use? What if cancer such as the cancer that struck my aunt, struck them and left them permanently disfigured? What would they do then? Would they still sit in judgment of others? What if nothing ever happens to them? What if they opt for plastic surgery to hide the wrinkles and the flab? What will happen when they die?

I suppose that all these questions arising in my head is part of what makes me write. I long to follow out the storyline, to follow out the what ifs. I hope and most definitely pray that in the situation of these girls that God will grab their heart and do whatever it takes to arrest their attention and draw them back to Him.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Welcome!

Once again I have resurrected a blog dedicated to my craft... my writing. Thus I have named this blog Phoenix Muse. I do not promise greatness or even plentiful posts. I seem to suffer from a lack of initiative when it comes to posting online.

I deduced recently that the aforementioned lack of initiative likely comes from my double attempts (I keep a "hard copy" journal) but I am going to segregate this journal as simply something for my craft though that might include various things due to the curious nature of life upon writing.

For much of November my posts will be oriented around nanowrimo and my senior history paper. Enjoy!